Twenty Boy Summer by Sarah Ockler - Review

Synopsis via goodreads:

"Don't worry, Anna. I'll tell her, okay? Just let me think about the best way to do it."
"Okay."
"Promise me? Promise you won't say anything?"
"Don't worry." I laughed. "It's our secret, right?"

According to her best friend Frankie, twenty days in is the perfect opportunity to have a summer fling, and if they meet one boy ever day, there's a pretty good chance Anna will find her first summer romance. Anna lightheartedly agrees to the game, but there's something she hasn't told Frankie---she's already had that kind of romance, and it was with Frankie's older brother, Matt, just before his tragic death one year ago.

Beautifully written and emotionally honest, this is a debut novel that explores what it truly means to love someone and what it means to grieve, and ultimately, how to make the most of every single moment this world has to offer.

What an emotional roller coaster; one minute I might be laughing, the next balling my eyes out, wanting to curl up in a little ball, and cry till all the tears in my body are gone, but I don't because I want to know how this story ends. Do either of the main characters ever find peace?

The first chapter of Twenty Boy Summer, is our first peek into Anna's head – “Frankie and I are lucky, that's what they all said.” But as you flip the page to chapter two, your transported to another time, another life, almost. A life in which Matt is still there. Frankie and Anna's very best friend in this whole wild, and wacky world!

Matt is Frankie's brother and Matt, Anna and Frankie are BFF's – and have been since any of them can remember; they shared baths together, they threw birthday parties together, they gossiped together...they were 3 pea's in a pod, always – even though Matt is older, it did not seem to matter to any of them.

That is until Anna's 15th birthday party; Anna and Matt get into a huge cake fight, and when they go to clean up; he kisses her! Anna's always had a “secret” crush on Matt, but with him being older, and with them being friends, she never wanted to “rock the boat.” And, of course, there was always Frankie to consider; but when Matt kisses her, her world turns upside down.

Matt and Anna start having moonlit meetings, hiding there relationship under the cover of darkness, for fear that once Frankie finds out she might feel, left out, hurt or worse, mad. Matt asks Anna to not say anything, she hates the idea of not telling her best friend, but with Matt's convincing tone, she reluctantly agrees. It's not forever, she tells herself; It's not like we're never going to tell her, Matt just wants to do it, while there in California, on vacation – alone.

But then, a tragic accident, a life lost, no one knew about the hole in Matt's heart and on that faithful day when Matt, Frankie and Anna get into the car, no one knew it would end with only two of them walking away.

But Frankie and Anna are lucky right, after all they survived – but what no one on the outside seems to get is that, neither one of them survived; they are both just hanging on by the skin of there teeth; and when Frankie breaks down and and needs Anna most; Anna puts aside her own feelings to be there for her friend.

Even though Anna is suffering, she is destined to suffer in silence – to be there for her friend, a friend whom does not know about the secret relationship that she and Matt were having. Was it even a relationship, Anna questions – they never got the chance to define it.

It's been a year since Matt, and everyone seems to have forgotten about him – everyone except those who loved him most. When Matt and Frankie's parents ask Anna to join them for there usually summer vacation in California, Anna is excited – to see the ocean that Matt sent her post cards of, to touch the sand, feel the sun, taste the air – it was his favorite place, and Anna can't wait to see it, taste it!

Frankie gets a crazy notion; A Twenty Boy Summer, to go along with her appointing this A.B.S.E (Absolute Best Summer Ever). There going to be in California for 23 days, Frankie suggests 3 days to get settled in and then; it's time to meet the boys!

Anna reluctantly agrees , its been a while since she saw Frankie with a smile, and honestly she feels like she would do anything to keep it there. But how can Anna even think about another boy when all she can think about is the one she lost, the one she was not even sure she had? Can this really be A.B.S.E for them?

When I laid down to read last night, it was going on 8 and with more than ½ of Twenty Boy Summer left to read, I figured I would not finish it, however I was excited to dive back into the summer with the girls. Then, I kept telling myself – “just one more chapter, after this one, you will get to a good stopping place,” I never found that elusive stopping place until I turned the last page and there was no more words to read – inevitably, I had to stop...not that I wanted to.

I loved Twenty Boy Summer, but probably not for the reason's you might think; was the writing amazing, yes; was I captivated by the characters, yes (especially Anna)...but the main reason this book has found a special place in my heart is more because of what I brought to it as a reader. I could put myself into Anna's shoes, in more ways than one – the first boy I ever loved, is no longer with us...and I often find myself dreaming of a life, which can never be.

Twenty Boy Summer is very much about growing, grieving and figuring out that sooner or later you must live again, and that it's honestly OK to be happy. You can miss someone with all of your core, never laughing, never being happy, but if your honest with yourself would that be what they would want for you? I think not...and I know in my heart Matt would not have wanted that for either Anna or Frankie.

Bottom Line – An emotional roller coaster, filled with plunges where you feel like your insides will fall out if you don't level out soon, and ascents where your biting your nails waiting to see what happens next. Honestly, I can't remember the last time a novel made me feel as many emotions as this one did, I was laughing so hard I nearly peed my pants, and seconds later I was balled up on the bed crying my eyes out. It's an emotionally beautiful story! I wish we found out more about Frankie's parents in the end, but that's the ONLY criticism I can give to this one! I give it 5 mushrooms.

Twenty Boy Summer
By: Sarah Ockler
2910 Pages
Published: June 1, 2009
Publisher: Little Brown & Co

I bought Twenty Boy Summer at Borders to read in connection with the book battle!